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Techniques · Obsessing about your ex

Techniques for Intrusions, Rumination and Worry

Why can’t I stop thinking about them? Because not every thought is the same thought. Some are memories that jump in uninvited. Some are a “why?” that goes round and round. Some are a “what if?” about the future. Each one needs a different technique. Use the wrong one and it can make the thoughts worse.

The aim

Name the thought first. Then use the one technique that works for it.

What you get

  • A decision tree to tell intrusions, rumination and worry apart
  • A checklist for one particular thought or image
  • One technique for each: Rewind & hold, finding and reframing your beliefs, problem-solving, and accepting uncertainty
  • Practice examples to label
  • Free, sent to your email.

From my researchIn my research, intrusions (thoughts and memories that pop in uninvited) on their own explained about 65% of breakup grief.

A look inside

Dr. Silvia Buet González

Created by

Dr. Silvia Buet González

Author and psychologist. Over 35 years of experience in the UK as a BABCP-accredited CBT psychotherapist. PhD research on breakup distress at Queen’s University Belfast.

More about me →See what I found →

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Techniques for Intrusions, Rumination and Worry